people underestimate how complex and corrupted a women’s relationship to our own desires can be (because we have spent a lifetime being told what we want doesn’t matter…in general…and that we exist to serve and please others)
epilogue: a book that made me cry. The final short story of Buzzati’s The K never fails to make me cry. It’s been years since i read it for the first time and it’s just….. the loss of innocence, and childhood, all that. i almost never cry when im reading, so it has to be pretty hard. there is also Le Premier Quartier de la lune by Michel Tremblay, it’s one of the….. idk….. 3 books? that made me cry. because it deals with a neuroatypical child dealing with mental illness, so….
i really recommend you read Tremblay if you can read French tho. its really, really good.
author: a book i regret buying. apparently i bought 2 copies of Aragon’s Les Beaux Quartiers (oops), there is also The Leviathan in original edition i bought like 3 days before dropping out of philosophy (it was due for a class). and, it was really expensive. now i hope it will make my bookshelf look impressing. (ill probably read it one day tho). and, last but not least, copies of books by a friend of mine. i love her, she’s a really good friend and mentor, but im not a big fan of her work tbh. and that costed money lmao
a thin girl wearing sweats and a messy bun and old t-shirts or jerseys and slippers and etc. is cute and so loveable and sexy and girl next door like
but a fat girl in the same exact outfit is sloppy and lazy and unattractive and must mean she doesn’t care about her appearance and doesn’t take care of herself
The further you are from the thin/cis/white/etc. definition of “beauty”, the more intensely you are expected to perform femininity as a way to “make up for” your failure to be perfect.
Despite what modern core nihilism will tell you, the accidental nature and inherent meaninglessness of life as a biological phenomenon does not mean that our efforts are pointless but instead allows us all to determine what we personally desire out of life. It means we are free to pursue what our hearts desire, and so enables each of us to find our own unique meaning.
Also love is real.
And the majority of people in the world are inherently good-natured.
“if nothing we do matters, then all that matters is what we do.”
also, i want to apologize to people whose messages were ever ignored by me or took me ages to reply to. i have no excuses, i’m just shit at communicating and a lot of time get stuck in my own head, postpone replying and then either forget about it or think that it is too late to reply. i’m sorry if i’ve ever made someone feel bad bc of this – honestly, it’s never personal, it’s just me and my inner problems. i will try harder to work on it. thank you for ever initiating conversations with me
